What I need to get off my chest is the inaccurate word choice that so many have been using in Josh's situation. Relapse. Let me give you the dictionary definition of relapse…
Relapse: (of someone suffering from a disease) Suffer deterioration after a period of improvement.
- Okay, sorta sounds like Josh Hamilton's night of drinking.
Now, let me give you the definition of relapse from someone in recovery…
Relapse: Falling all the way back to square one. Acting 100% of the time on your symptoms and behaviors. Denying that you are back at rock bottom. Isolating yourself from others to avoid being seen sick again. The only way back to being "sober" is to go back through the entire process of treatment.
- Doesn't sound so much like Josh, huh?
And now let's hear from Josh himself…
"I could hide in shame, and not show up tonight and be withdrawn, but I didn't want to do that," Hamilton told the group while reiterating his Christian faith. "I'm doing what I had to do today. I am fessing up. I am going to be a man about it; I am fessing up. People are going to call me a hypocrite, but I am a sinful man."
Something that is so so so important that I have learned while in treatment is there is a reality in relapse but there is also something called a lapse. A lapse is a mess up, a shitty day, temporary symptom usage but it is followed by admitting the issue and reaching out for help to get back on track. A lapse is having a bad night and binging, purging or restricting OR in Josh's case drinking an alcoholic beverage. After the bad night you then get back on your feet, no matter how wobbly and you process your actions, emotions and feelings of the night before. You then create a plan to have in place when another opportunity presents itself to lapse and you continue RECOVERING!
Black and white thinking is something that is so common with those who suffer from eating disorders. It's either your 100% sick or your 100% recovered. You go ten days of no purging and then mess up one time and all of a sudden the months of treatment don't matter anymore and you are back at square one waiting for the feeding tube. It doesn't work this way. I've said it before and I'll say it again; recovery is NOT perfect, it is NOT clean and it is NOT an all or nothing thing. There are ups and there are downs. There are tears and anger and yelling and imperfections all along the way. We must realize that as human beings, just like God created us, we are IMPERFECT! We are going to MESS UP! That's the beauty of grace, friends. Some of us will only experience lapse's throughout our recovery process, while some of us will experience relapse but no matter what we serve a God who sees a child pure as snow.
I hurt for Josh because the media has been waiting like a lion ready to pounce on a…ehh idk deer? It's as if they were waiting for him to mess up so they could start an uproar about his alcohol relapse. I can only pray that Josh continues to stand firm in the Lord, that he realizes that he made a mistake and he is willing to get the help he needs to refuse the next temptation that the devil throws in his face. I pray that those who are scrutinizing him for his actions feel a sting in their heart from conviction and choose to love on Josh and all of those suffering from addictions. We don't wait and watch for someone to fail. Yes, we are there for them if and when they do fall but more importantly we are there to walk side by side each other as we all face our own battles. We are to push each other in the right direction, keep each other afloat and offer the words of encouragement to help us succeed.
**Don't forget it's February-Share-Your-Story-Month! We had a fabulous lady, Kelly share her's with us a few days ago. If you haven't had the chance to read it then read the post right before this one! And if you want to share a little something something then let me know :)
love.love.love
2 comments:
Loved this post! All SO TRUE.
AMEN, SISTER!!!!!!!
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