Coffee With Jesus

A few days ago I found myself sitting on the floor of LifeWay Christian Book Store. Now, this was not an abnormal thing for me, sitting on the floor flipping through books, but the difference was the tears starting to well up in my eye lids. I could feel the lump in my throat as I became more aware of the fact that my heart was aching for Jesus, the tears I desperately were holding back were meant for weeping, for repenting of my selfish ways and realizing how our Sovereign God was telling my heart to grab His outstretched hand and let Him carry me.

"Caitlan. My daughter, put down those books and pick yourself up off the floor. Together lets go and get acquainted once again. Let me reintroduce myself to you my precious child. Let me tell you the love I have for you and let me tell you stories of healings, saints and grace. Yes, I already know everything about you, Caitlan but I want to hear about you from your own words. I want to hear your voice telling me your pains, hurt, joys and doubt. I want to hear you reading scripture, My Word, because that is music to My ears. My beautiful and broken child it has been far too long since we have last spoken. Lets change that, one day at a time."

These are the words that I heard over the next 24 hours. In obedience and desire for my Father I will be meeting Him for coffee on a daily basis. I will listen to Him as He shares His knowledge and love with me and He will listen to me as I cry out for help. I have set aside the book of Romans and will focus on nothing but Jesus and myself. He will lead me to the scriptures and stories He wants me to read. He will guide me as I work on knocking down my walls of doubt and mistrust. He will be my eyes until mine are no longer fogged with sin and lies. Most importantly He will love me even if it takes me a while to feel that warmth.

‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’