God is just SO good! Man, yesterday He just totally rocked my socks off. I noticed more so today after I woke up to a new morning, a new sunrise and new opportunities. But let me tell you He is so faithful. Yesterday, my eyes were opened to new pockets of my heart, mind and thoughts. Although what I discovered with the help of Alison (dietitian) wasn't the most joyous of discoveries about myself and un-welcomed thoughts I feel as if I can now breath a little easier and maybe feel a little bit of peace. I thank God that my doctors are willing and able to move at my pace, as slow as that may be they continuously put their foot on the brake if needed. Although I would much rather snap my fingers and be on the other side of what I've labeled as terrifying, I know that would only lead me to another sinful habit or struggle. I think in this situation, and in most, we should remember the story of the Tortes and the Hair. Slow and steady wins the race. I think I would rather be the Tortes with a victorious outcome than the Hair whose fast pace quickly turns to stumbling along. Being slow can be miserable, I'll admit it. I would rather my afternoons be filled with coffee dates and study dates rather doctor appointments. I would rather my soon to be bulletin board be pinned with fun pictures than meal plans and how to be mindful. But I have accepted that is what it is for now and will be for a while. I'm not moving at a fast pace, I'm not ready for that yet. I am moving and I have to constantly be reminded of that from friends, doctors and myself. I am moving slow but steady.
And let me just go ahead and take a moment to say how much I love Phi Lamb. Seriously, those girls keep me going whether they realize it or not. I love the vulnerability that is being poured out right and left, the genuine prayers for healing, tears of heart ache being shared for one another and the love that has been woven through each one of us by Jesus Christ. Last night I was reminded that I do have faith in God and it is how so sweet. Unlike last semester when I was so certain I had lost all faith, I now not only feel it in my heart but I can see it in faces of my sisters. They may not feel as if they have faith but last night I saw girls who are hurting and girls who are rejoicing put their faith in a Mighty Father. And I thank God for that faith in myself and the glimpses of faith flickering in brokenness and tears. Man, I'll say it again but God is good, so so good.
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